voidprinxe:

stop hating on girls who wanna kiss people in museums or aquariums or art galleries stop hating on girls who want things that might be cliche stop hating on girls who want boys to treat them like they’re magic i will protect all girls with my life and just because they care about things that you don’t doesn’t give you the right to belittle them ok i will fight u

(via amazzingphil)

100 NSFW TMI Questions you probably have never been asked:

1. Are you a virgin?
2. Does anyone besides you know your bra/penis size?
3. Do you know anyone who has any STDs?
4. Were you married when you first lost your virginity?
5. Do you swear under celibacy?
6. When did you first lose your virginity? If you haven't, when would you like to?
7. Have you ever gotten tricked into aphrodisiacs or alcohol for sex?
8. Have you walked in on someone masturbating/having sex?
9. Have you ever seen someone masturbate or have sex with their permission?
10. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
11. If you had to chose one, would you have outdoor sex or car sex?
12. When was the age you first masturbated? Whether you knew it or not?
13. Have you ever helped someone "finish"?
14. Have you ever had an erection in the past month? (clitorial counts, too)
15. When was the last time you have had an erection? (clitorial counts, too)
16. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?
17. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)
18. What is your bra/penis size?
19. Has anyone seen your private parts other than yourself or a family member?
20. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?
21. Do you like rough sex or intimate sex better?
22. When was the last time you masturbated?
23. When was the last time you had sex?
24. When was the last time you watched porn?
25. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?
26. Guys: Circumsized?
27. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?
28. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?
29. Girls: Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?
30. What color/type of underwear are you wearing?
31. Have you ever sent someone a picture or video of you in the nude? Did it include sexual actions?
32. Have you ever posted a picture of image of you in the nude on a website? Did it include sexual actions?
33. Have you ever anonymously sent/posted a picture or video of yourself in the nude? Did it include sexual actions?
34. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?
35. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?
36. Which wet dream was your favorite?
37. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?
38. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?
39. Have you ever masturbated with someone?
40. Have you ever took a shower with someone that is not a family member?
41. Favorite sexual position? If you are a virgin, which position interests you?
42. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?
43. Are you into any BDSM?
44. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?
45. Turn on's?
46. Turn off's?
47. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy about someone? Was it about anyone other than your lover?
48. Have you ever had phone sex? Video sex? Chat box sex?
49. What was the weirdest thing that has ever turned you on?
50. Do you like dirty talk?
51. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?
52. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?
53. Most embarressing sex/masturbation story?
54. Most hilarious sex/masturbation story?
55. What kind of porn do you like to watch?
56. First type of porn you have ever watched? (ie. lesbian, hentai, threesome)
57. What was the most recent type of porn you have ever watched? What category was it under?
58. Most hilarious/stupidest porn you have ever watched?
59. Have you ever fantasized over someone older than you? How much older? Younger? How much younger?
60. Favorite sex toy (if any)?
61. Have you ever had to break up with/divorce someone because you weren't satisfied with their sex?
62. Have you ever used anything/gotten any surgeries to improve sexual performance/feel?
63. If someone you knew asked for a nude image, would you do it? What about a tumblr follower?
64. Have you ever told someone any wet dreams/fantasies you've had about them?
65. Do you like to have sex like they do in pornos?
66. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?
67. Are you able to be secretive when you masturbate? (like able to be quiet so no one can hear?)
68. When was the first time you achieved orgasm?
69. Is there only one way so far that you have been able to achieve orgasm? (ie. only by using toys, only from 1 positon,only from masturbating a certain way)
70. Favorite type of oral?
71. Strangest sexual positon you've tried?
72. Have you ever made up a sexual postion?
73. Girls: During sex, vaginal or anal?
74. Girls: During masturbation, clitorial, vaginal, or anal?
75. Do you like to be dominant or submissive?
76. Have you ever masturbated to someone?
77. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn't there when you needed them?
78. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?
79. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?
80. Have you ever had sex with someone who wasnt your partner?
81. Has any of your partners had sex with someone else?
82. Have you ever gotten pregnant? Were they your lover's or someone else's?
83. Birth control or condoms?
84. Do you ever masturbate to porn?
85. Does anyone know you masturbate? Did you have to tell them?
86. Did your parents ever find out you were sexually active?
87. Do you have any STDs?
88. Have you ever masturbated to a fictonal character or celebrity?
89. Have you ever had sex during "7 minutes in heaven"?
90. Spit or swallow? Or do you not like oral?
91. Have you ever been rejected for sex? Have you ever rejected someone else?
92. Do you have someone who said they are willing to take away your virginity if you havent lost it by a set age or if you just want to have a good time?
93. Have you ever experiented with the opposite sex?
94. When you first lost your virginity, was it intended or spontanious?
95. Has anyone ever walked in when you were taking a shower with someone?
96. Did you ever tell someone once you lost your virginity?
97. Does your lover know if you have masturbated?
98. Does your lover know that you want to have sex with them but cant?
99. Do you like masturbation?
100. (Asker's ask) If i were to ask you if we could have sex, would you say yes?

Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)

Dad: Why the hell did you put a comma there?
Dad: Do you even know what a participial phrase is?
Dad: Omg. He's like my favorite character of all time.
Dad: Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?
Dad: Hey are you awak? I know it's late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can't tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.
Dad: Alesha wouldn't be able to spell 'definitely' right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write 'defiantly', because she doesn't care. I hate her.
Dad: I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.
Dad: Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don't like tattoos and he's like twenty-five. And for Christ's sake, he teaches math.
Dad: Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.
Dad: Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It'll be called Great Expectations.
Dad: It's like you didn't read the fucking book.
Dad: Okay. So this week you're reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth's. It's like sixty pages long, but you'll love it.
Dad: *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*
Dad: My son doesn't like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren't my son. Leave.
Dad: Okay. So you're getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I'm a teacher, and since I'm a teacher, it's all I can afford, so...
Dad: Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.
Dad: I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.
Dad: Fuck the government.
Dad: Fuck the school board.
Dad: Close the door.
Dad: Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he's such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.
Dad: I love puns.
Dad: People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.
Dad: Please shut up.
Dad: Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.
Dad: I wouldn't get so mad when you call me at school if you didn't change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.
Dad: I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.
Dad: You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.
Dad: Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.
Dad: I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I'm too lazy.
Dad: If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.
Dad: They act like I care what they think.
Dad: I hate homework.
Dad: I have decided to become a politician.
Dad: What's the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.
buzzfeedceleb:

em-azingg:

Zac after he dropped a condom on the rep carpet! 

Never forget.

buzzfeedceleb:

em-azingg:

Zac after he dropped a condom on the rep carpet! 

Never forget.

(via twerking-lester)

troyes-lip-ring:

EVERY SINGLE PERSON. EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON.

WHO REBLOGS THIS WILL GET “it’s a metaphor" IN THEIR ASK BOX

(via troyes-lip-ring)

weedhowell:

danisnotonfire | 2012 -> 2014

(Source: amazinghil, via cut-and-lie)

reading in head: i'm practically a master of linguistics my pronunciations are perfect beyond compare
reading aloud: *chokes on spit*

at the premiere of #ThorDarkWorld!! ..

at the premiere of !! ..

(Source: tamagotcho, via sydisnotonfire)